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Flywheel

On Moods

Man, I’ve been really wistful recently. I’ve been thinking about the relationships in my life how I’ve done a half assed job of maintaining them. Maintaining and establishing relationships is hard. I’ve heard it’s a pretty common phenomenon for post college grads to struggle somewhat with relationships after losing the training wheels of school, which makes sense.

School is an incredibly conducive environment to build and maintain relationships, because you’re forced to interact with other people on a regular schedule and have pre-planned activities with them. Once you’re out of school, the only people you see regularly are your coworkers. Everything else takes planned work on your own part. Assuming you don’t live with your parents, it will require work to maintain that relationship – calls to your parents, visits to home, etc. If you have a hobby or activity like volunteering that requires interacting with the outside world, you might meet some people who also regularly participate in that hobby. But that also requires work on your part to attend regularly. Besides that, other friends in your life will require effort to contact them, agree on an activity to do, and try to fit in a time slot that works for both of you.  It’s a ton of work to keep this up consistently.

It’s one more aspect of solo living that I find interesting and challenging. You have freedom to build any relationship you want, but that same freedom means you can neglect your relationships. Life really opens up after school – you can do anything you want, but this freedom isn’t necessarily good – it means you have an infinite amount of rope with which to hang yourself.

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